The "Dating" Lesson

LDS Boys don't know how to date. They approach things the same way they do on their mission when they are asking someone to read the Book of Mormon, or get baptized or something. The idea is, well, ok - I mean, "building a relationship of trust" first and all that is a good idea - but in reality it makes dating an awful affair for girls like me. Here's the key difference: One Date IS NOT the same as a life changing commitment to convert to a whole new way of life by joining the LDS church. One Date IS NOT a commitment! Wait 'till you know the person first before stressing over marriage potential!

But, because they look at it the same, they put so much pressure into it that most of them are just terrible at even asking girls out at all.

This lack of dating is a serious concern to any leadership of young single adults. Therefore, the boys are occasionally given "The Lesson." "You need to date these young women in our ward. It is part of your priesthood responsibility. How will you ever marry if you can't date? Brethren, will you commit to asking one girl out this week or month? Do your duty!"

And so, the men come out of class today... several have been scared to death and quickly sneak away before they have to look at any girls and feel guilty - especially since that one girl they can't stand keeps stalking and knows today was "The Lesson." Much worse, several guys exit with a new found determination: scoping their prey... who should I ask? who should I ask? Is she cute enough? Would she go out with me? Could I stand being married to her? Whoa buddy.

Hi. It's me. Just a girl - sure I'd go out, but right now I feel like part of a menu in a swarm. Would you prefer sugar candy, steak, or fresh vegetables? But also, why not look to me as a possible FRIEND first? Can we JUST go out?

What's scary is these are the days it's hardest to avoid those "social misfits." Bad haircut, bad glasses, unbecoming personality is RIGHT THERE at my side everywhere I turn. I've done good at avoiding until now (at least in this ward) but today there is no escaping talking to him. I DO, however, manage to escape the building without being asked on a single date.

Doesn't mean I wouldn't like a date - but I'd prefer one without this pressure, thank you.